Tag Archives: hell

Apocalyptic Self Care

Standard

 

8d1554d0-66b1-4bec-aa8f-810679e00131_zps02f0d308-971x576Zombies, nuclear war, pandemic, we know  one of these is going to get us, its only a question of when…

Being prepped for the big day will determine if you are a survivor or end up being part of the masses who ultimately end up eating each other.

Enough doom and gloom; here are some common place ideas that are FREE!

  • The next time you go to a restaurant for breakfast, eat the toast dry and take home the jam or peanut butter. You know the ones, they come in those cute little metal holders and look something like this.  bbbThey are like gold on the post apocalypse/ black market. There is so much sugar in the jams and jelly’s they are sure to last as long as it takes for the black out to hit.

spreads-pkg-kpb-smooth

  • Peanut butter is primo, you will need the extra protein boost to out run your neighbor who is trying to eat your face.   You can easily trade one of these for something more useful like a barbecue fork; long and pointy, perfect for stabbing through  chain link fence.
  • Once the survivors have lived a few weeks without their favorite shampoo and soap, they will do just about anything to smell better. Humans have this habit of stinking like last years puke it they don’t shower or bathe.
526612483_df70725fb0

hotel freebies

  • There will probably be a limited supply of water ; the goodies you do have should be small enough to fit into the palm of your hand. The last thing you want is to be mugged standing in the lineup to get a trickle of musty water at the gas station crap hole.
  • Don’t forget you will need weapons,  preferably more than one type. You’ll want something you can throw and another you can stab or poke with; if you have time grab a can of coke, you can barter with it, or use it for pretty much anything else.

2885321197_af4b8904d4                                                                                                            0a4f6bd3f2748d07880125ae6f6e5e71--zombie-weapons-epic-fail                   maxresdefault

Self care means all sorts of things and covers a wide range of scenarios; bags similar to these are more valuable than you can possibly imagine.

dog-waste-bags-rainboww

  1. Use them when doing your own business, after that they make great crap bombs.
  2. They are great for color coding rations.
  3. When scavenging for food and meds use them for important items like candy or ex-lax.
  4. Use them to  hand out Halloween candy, so many pretty colors to choose from
  • Meditation during the apocalypse may seem a bit of a joke, but it will be helpful to those that  know they are loosing it. Find a quiet space, like the inside of a gas station bathroom, 160915170405-15-huntington-heroin-story-restricted-super-169 hunker down and drift away…but keep at least one eye open.

nut-job2.jpg

Advertisements